Jan/Feb 1999 Poetry |
Like Autumn Ghosts
one hand moves through another
the undeniable cooling each touch
the touch of memory another season
of leaves long shadows
the house settles in its own noises
drafts whisk dust in to clouds
like ghosts we move the same way
with Autumn in our hearts
over wooden floors to afternoon light
through one window one gray sky window
light guttering through us
if I said a word a whisper even
it would haunt me like the fall
Somewhere Between Here and There
I am sitting with the ducks again
ones that never fly anywhere
not for a season or change
Autumn that cold garnet in half light
lands on us God I am here
and do not want to be she said
I am a coward and there is
so much truth to this that I run away
from it again it is over like summer
gone with a gray day that chills into me
fingers my spine I am afraid of failure
the job the poetry this woman
that husband in another city someone
in a black jacket the hand in a pocket
everyone else’s confidence
that autumnal shadow stretching
out to touch winter
it’s all something striking my fear
you can’t be a good guy and feel desire
and own it not in this life my life
where summer closes its eye
and walks away door left open
moaning for that road sitting so still
so empty waiting for the changes
I fooled myself as these ducks have
every year the fast sunsets pull at
their wings and they deny it
their greens and browns no less shiny for it
I cannot save them return them
to a forgotten migratory path
I cannot save anything and I have tried
I have tried Lord I have sinned and tried
against all that is sacred in my skin I have
and these birds climb out of their manmade pond
expecting me to give them what they want food
my pockets empty as my skin
Autumn Leaf
as we walked the cold air
brought one gold oak leaf
sailing in front of her face
she caught it
and smiled slipping the stem
into the eye of her jacket zipper
but it fell free she
said it was almost meant for her
I went back for it
_ it is meant for you_
said she had no place to keep it
and I slipped it into my pocketI found it later in my shirt
laid it’s arms and head out flat
and dreamed of her face
that never kiss
we never kissed a thousand times
each one
soft sweet and waiting for rain
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