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Best Book: Mason & Dixon by Thomas Pynchon. Yes, it demands concentration and a little work, but so does cooking a steak instead of eating a twinkie.
So Close to Being a Best Book: Chris Offutt's The Good Brother. The man can write!
Worst Book: Kathryn Harrison's The Kiss. Sleeping with Dad is bad? Of course. Revealing? Sure. Boring? You betcha!
Best Alternate Title for Worst Book: Hop on Pop
Most Overrated Book: Mason & Dixon by Thomas Pynchon. Nothing could live up to that hype, even this great book.
Best in Music: The Verve, Fiona Apple, Alice in Chains, Counting Crows, Crash Test Dummies
Worst in Music: The Spice Girls (even Hanson can claim a little talent. Wonder how they got their jobs?), Elton John (I will never call him Sir... and since when is a third rehash of a sappy song a "tribute"? I would have remade Wham's song into "I'm Never Gonna Die Again"), U2 (yes, you are the only one's staring at the sun you idiots).
Best Television: King of the Hill and The Simpsons.
Worst Television: Coverage of Princess Di becoming Princess Dead. She courted the media while pretending to loathe it. Now I loathe them both.
Worst Television II: Ally McBeal. Enough said.
Worst Television III: Seinfeld leaving while still ten times better than his nearest contender.
Best in Sports:Tiger Woods demolishes them at the Master's-- and I don't even like golf.
Worst in Sports: Latrell Sprewell. A "black thing" my lily-white ass.
Best Movie: Donnie Brasco (hey, I don't get to the movies much!)
Best Movie I Haven't Seen Yet: Jackie Brown, As Good as It Gets.
Worst Movie: In and Out. Worst title for a movie too.
Best in Justice: Striking down the CDA. That piece of trash was so vague and paranoid that it should have been written in invisible ink.
Worst in Justice: Louise Woodward getting no jail time. She killed a child for chrissakes.
Best in Politics: Convention against land mines. This actually means something.
Best in Politics II: Jocelyn Elders. You go girl.
Worst Saying: You go girl.
Best Saying: Yada Yada Yada.
Worst in Politics: Binyamin Netanyahu. He is determined to have war just to stroke his outlandish ego.
Worst in Politics II: Laurent Kabila. We traded up for this?
Worst in Politics III: Russian and French politicos banded for Saddam Hussein. Put these politics in the desert first.
Best Webzine- Lit and Art: The Blue Moon Review
Best Webzine- General: Salon Magazine
Best in Web Technology: Style sheets!
Worst in Web Technology: Spam, Spam and MORE Spam.
Most Overrated in Web Technology: "Push" technology. I'm supposed to choose advertising that crashes my computer?
Most Overrated in Web Technology II: The Microsoft anti-trust suit. They make the best products and buy the best ideas-- and the losers don't like it. Wah.
Most Useless Technology: The "car pager." I can use my cell phone to unlock my car doors? Isn't the key just a little bit easier?
